I woke up this morning with only 3 hours sleep. Yet I was determined to make it a good day. I've got so much exciting stuff that happening today that if I want it to go well, it only can go well.
I wasn't groggy, dizzy or anything else this morning, not like I usually am after hardly any sleep. I'd agreed to go in an hour earlier to work at 6am, allowing me to finish an hour earlier and go to the football. That couldn't have worked out any better for me. The shop I work in has massive windows at the end of the store that you can see a long way over Sheffield from. At around 6.34 I got to see the sun rise from the back of the peaks of Sheffield. It's quite fitting that I got to see the sun rise today. See the true start of a new day. It was absolutely beautiful, seeing the blinding light sweep over those Yorkshire peaks. I'm going to go out into my garden tonight and watch the sun set over Sheffield as well, to see the start and the end of the same day in all its beauty is going to be so nice.
I'd decided to be one hundred percent completely positive for my last day at work. Despite the negativity and arguing from others around me, I was going to enjoy myself one last time. It's amazing what you can feel if you're determined to enjoy yourself. I didn't care at all for the judgement of others. I sang my way through those 5 hours and they flew, just because I was having fun, doing my job and not caring at all what people thought about me. While they didn't know it was a goodbye, I said goodbye to a few people the way I wanted to, in a way that you would if you were never going to see some people again. It's a shame two people who are my friends are at loggerheads with each other on my last day there, but I can't let that bother me too much.
After work my dad picked me up, I got changed, and off we went to the football. I was nervous, excited, and just ready to enjoy the day out at a packed Bramall lane for an FA CUP quarter final. I won't bother too much with the football rhetoric, but it was mostly a good day out. We won 2-0 and I enjoyed the last 20 minute,s when we were cruising to victory, immensely.
However, there were some sour thoughts at the football, I saw a man be stretchered round the outside of the pitch, that didn't make me feel good at all, I managed to convince myself due to the crutches laid by his side that he'd just fallen over, though, and wasn't dying. I felt faint throughout the match, probably just due to tiredness. But because my throat was sore and my heart was racing, I couldn't fully shake the feeling that I was going to have a panic attack, and I just wanted to enjoy today. As a Sheffield United fan this is our biggest day in years, and I couldn't truly enjoy it, all the time I spent was worrying. My mind was already made up, but if you can't completely enjoy your best moments in life, what's the point?
After the game, still running on adrenaline and wonder, me and my old man decided to return home then head out for the pub for one or two. After a quick change we walked around 5 minutes to our local. It was nice that I got to spend time with my Dad and just both of us being genuinely happy with something to talk about. I've just got home now, and I'm really happy I got to enjoy that time with just me and my father, as I've always been closer to him than my mother.
My Nan is coming round for tea tonight, it's nice that I'll get to see her again and we'll be there as a family. I've stopped drinking since I got back from the pub as I want to enjoy the rest of this day sober and aware. It's a shame my brother is out at his mates and won't be back for tea.
Some see Sunday as the end of the week, some see it as the start. I'm not sure what I see today as, the end or rather the beginning of something new. I'm glad I've enjoyed today, and without being self centered, I think I deserved to enjoy today and have a nice time with my friends, colleagues and family.
I'd like to make peace with a few last people, but that's dependent on them. If not, I'm also not one to make parting shots, but I'll do it anyway just because; Who's the fucking liar and the coward now?
See ya, dudes.
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